Moving, Stretching, Changing, Staying the Same...

Or, When Change Happens in Terms of Place: the flip side. Not really the Sancho Panza to the Quixote in my lifestyle of grownup uprootedness, but rather more like the pepper to the salt, even though pepper makes me sneeze at the same time I love it, is the way that the relationship of my moving about should be framed. 

This post is the follow-up to what I think was a quite lamenting list of what is perceived as losses from a life of (a lot of) moving. I've memories of living in five states, eight cities, eleven residences just since my marriage in 1980. This is in great contrast to the rootedness of my existence since I was 5 - my parents still live on the same street; my grandparents lived and died in the same house; 40 of my 63 classmates were together k - 12.  I guess I had strong roots and therefore big wings. (sigh). Roots and wings.

What does one gain from going from one place to another?  Lots.

My list of what has been gained through moving:

1. Becoming an outsider and appreciating insider/outsider status
2. Learning to embrace change.
3. A honed sense of how to make and keep really good friends and what makes ties that bind
4. Knowing how to start from scratch, embracing new opportunities
5. Creating a sense of place, wherever
6. Learning about culture and regions
7. A heightened sense of priorities
8. Existing in a state of creating, becoming
9. Living in the present and becoming future-oriented
10. Developing the ability to toss and move on
11. Knowing how to go out of bounds, to stretch, to reach
12. Being able to be comfortable with discomfort
13. Discovering and appreciating new and different perspectives on life
14. Fostering a sense of adventure
15. Knowing that although Home is Where the Heart Is, Home is also a sense of Place.
16. Learning how to go into new environments and new places
17. Expanding my personal metaphorical backyard and belonging on a broad basis to more places
18. Developing flexibility and adaptability
19. Applying a spirit of adventure continuously
20. Wiping the slate clean again and again
21. Learning how to land on my feet
22. Understanding what defines me
23. Having the time to blog, for free. here. ha. Maybe the most irrelevant. or not.

And, I'm still transitioning.  More on that, later.

Comments

[allison]

Before we moved to Texas almost 5 years ago, we were in the same small town in Oklahoma for 14 years. There were so many people that we knew who had never lived anywhere else, they knew everyone in town, had all their long-time school friends there, etc. At times I thought how nice it would be to have that constant element of life & the family homestead that you can always go home to. Now with my parents gone, I have sometimes felt adrift until I remember I'm the matriarch and the one to create that home environment my children and someday grandchildren, will cherish as part of their life journey, no matter where that home may be located.

[Kay Dennison]

In some ways I envy you this; in others, I don't. I wish I had the courage (& money) to pull up stakes and look for greener pastures. I've never really felt at home here. I wonder if there's anywhere I do feel at home.

[Cilicious]

Wow, that's a lot of moving. I moved around a lot as a kid, but after marriage in 1982, we only lived in two different homes (in the same city, Denver) before moving to north Florida, where we moved around and around before settling in one spot in 2007.
I especially agree with #21.
It's been tricky, the past couple years.

[Home in Cambridge]

Both of these are great lists. I can so relate to your list of lost possessions - I'm a packrat at heart and always envy anyone who's lucky enough to have a multi-generation home - your stuff stays in much better shape when it doesn't get moved.

My many moves were as an adult moving from rental to rental (and now a few house to house moves). I'm hoping to make my current house my final spot. We only moved once growing up and it wasn't easy. I do think that kids who move a lot can become quite resilient - but they earn their stripes.